One year. One Thing.

Dear Friend,

Has it really been a year? Time flies huh. 

But there's not one day that i wish you were still here.

Still filled with regrets and what-ifs from time to time.

Sometimes, a selfish or noble part of me, still wishes it was me.

I was contemplating whether to go visit you on Sunday, cause' I was still afraid to face your family. It's just..difficult. 

So I went in the late afternoon and ran into your good friend, Jing Long. 

We talked about the past, how are your bunch of friends coping.

They played a match, and it felt different on the pitch.

I didn't even knew you played! 

And of course he asked about the accident.

I felt obligated, so I described everything to him. It was still not easy, and I can feel it was not easy for him to listen to it too.

Then, he told me about his dream just a few days back, where he sat with you and one other friend, just like the old days. Everything seemed normal and real, and you were really there. 

I cannot imagine how your closed ones feel, during dreams like that. 

To be honest, we weren't that close.

We only knew each other for like half a year? We ran into each other at zouk with Bella? 

And we became housemates after that, and we started to know each other better.

Like we both love mambo and the 90s music.

I remember I was streaming a Newcastle match, and was getting all excited, and you were laughing at my huge reactions and stuff.
Your MANUAL Toyota RAV-4.

The one Sakuraya a week with emma.
Your singapore-painted face on National Day.

The lizard-like reptile which all of us did not manage to catch until you were home.

The long drive to Fish Rock with ced and emma.

The making fun of emma and syl "Making love out of nothing at all".

So little time spent, so little memories, but so many little details.

Here's a song I recently just heard again.

One Thing (Not One Direction's, but Finger Eleven's)

Restless tonight

Cause I wasted the light

Between both these times

I drew a really thin line

It's nothing I planned

And not that I can

But you should be mine

Across that line

If I traded it all

If I gave it all away for one thing

Just for one thing

If I sorted it out

If I knew all about this one thing

Wouldn't that be something

I promise I might

Not walk on by

Maybe next time

But not this time

Even though I know

I don't want to know

Yeah I guess I know

I just hate how it sounds

If I traded it all

If I gave it all away for one thing

Just for one thing

If I sorted it out

If I knew all about this one thing

Wouldn't that be something

If I traded it all

If I gave it all away for one thing

Just for one thing

If I sorted it out

If I knew all about this one thing

Wouldn't that be something

Even though I know

I don't want to know

Yeah I guess I know

I just hate how it sounds

Well, no prizes for guessing what's my one thing.
I don't know how or what is moving on.
Just hope that wherever you are, you are smiling, and looking after all your closed ones.
And keep the dreams going to them.
Hope you will visit me one day :) 

Miss you, Richie. 

BHMF, Princess Street.


-scotty