No courage, no confidence...

For once, I wanna do something to help..My long serving domestic helper whos with my family since im like 9 or 10, has been causing trouble while im in germany..Even my dad, gave up on her..I want to talk to her..what happened? wads causing all these..but when the right time finally came, i had no courage to talk to her..I didnt noe how to...I just dun trust myself anymore..I wanna make something right..but just cant..no confidence in doing anything...Seems like i lost something..my life...I lost my life...just an empty shell now...working my time away..........

L.i.F.e

Whats happening to me?? underperforming at both workplaces..Makin mistake after mistake. Im not angry at anyone..Just at myself. Sometimes although im 'helping' out, am i more of a nuisence than of help? would they be better off without me? At least they are assured of getting it right if they do things by themselves, as she said..Maybe i shld just quit and stay at hm instead of causing trouble to others..

Come to think of it..I really suck at everythin I do. Basketball in pri sch, badminton, football, judo, now work, studies(although i admit im not the most hardworking). Nthg to be proud of. Im really hopeless. I dunno wad to do in my life anymore. Recently this guy auctioned off his life on the internet, hoping to start anew..and got 1+ million dollar bids. im sure mine is worth much less.

And last thing..I wanna mention abt this bunch of con-ners. Money suckers. Whatever u call them. I just wanna say have u ppl not got anything better to do, other than go ard checking here and there, tryin to suck as much money as u can? C'mon everyone knows how rich u ppl are alr..Okie. So u want to check, FINE. Had alr prepared to the smallest detail as to whr the money had gone, u still dun wanna accept, and check till 6-7 yrs back summore..And after that, add up a total LARGE sum of amt. Lemme ask u. Whr is yur conscience. DO u think we can rmb wad happened 6-7 yrs ago? Not to mention small details here and there..There are definitely discripancies..But wad u r tellin us now is u want more than wad we ought to give. DOUBLE of the amount as penalty. Are u out of yur mind? Sick corrupted ******* Anyway, I just hope the time when we decided to give in, u guys can fcuk off and leave us alone.

Military cant come soon enough. ppl say everythin is planned out for u for 2 yrs. prob. these 2 yrs mite be a critical period for me to ponder and think abt my future and life...

Cant take it anymore!!

y do people cling on to the past so much? Some memories are beautiful, but others are painful as well..regrettin what u did or what u did not..just so difficult..im sorry for what i did not manage to do properly..
I know that its an answer which will disappoint..so wads the point? y do i still cling on? its impossible now...Really cant take this anymore..can i just heck care and come clean, and risk losing it..haiz...

Work work..

Had been workin so much this past week!! 7 days straight man..how cool is that...totally drained..People ask, chiong so much for what? Seriously, if u ask me, I dunno. really.

Haiz..Its so difficult..hope I had made the right decision and wont regret it in time to come....Sorry.